A COMPLETE STOP

On Thanksgiving, I ran the Subaru distance classic down in FL.  I wasn't feeling great, but I did it anyway because the pros outweighed the cons, at least in my book.  After a couple days off, I picked back up with my regular training.  For a week, I did my standard workouts....6 miles on Monday, 9 on Tuesday, yoga on Wednesday, 7 miles of intervals on Thursday and 6 again on Friday to close out the cycle.  All of them went fine.  Not great.  But not terrible.  In the winter, I work up at Cannon Mountain in NH.  On Saturday, a little over week since the Thanksgiving race, I was riding up on a chairlift by myself feeling like I was floating in no-man's land.  It was time for a little reality check.  That next day I was supposed to be getting up at 5:30am to drive down to Boston so I could get back in time to race in the Winter Classic 5K and then have brunch with my Oiselle teammates.  Oh man.  Just thinking about doing this made me tired.  There was just no way.  I felt like I was running on fumes.  My breathing was labored and I wasn't even moving my body.  How the hell was I going to race the next day?  It was at this moment I realized I'd been idling for too long.  I wasn't falling behind and I wasn't getting better.  I was just sitting in neutral.  And, I also realized, I could keep idling for days and days or I could snap to and turn off my engine.  No one likes an idler.  I pulled out my phone and texted my running bud, Jess C., to let her know that I couldn't make it to the race.  In so many words, I let her know that my battery was low and that I need to recharge, which she totally understood.  I hate missing races, especially ones that I've already registered for and that I really enjoy doing each year.  I hate missing an opportunity to catch up with my teammates and celebrate post race.  But, I also hate doing all those things and feeling 'so-so'.  What's the point in that?  For several days, a lot of important and fun things have been happening and I've been half in and half out.  Not good for me.  Not good for anyone else.  I'm going on 3 days now in total shut down mode.  No running.  No physical activity of any kind.  Beyond my regular 'to-do's, I've done a lot of other things.  I've finished a book.  I've done some laundry.  I've helped my kids make a fort using all the sheets in our linen closet and a full roll of duct tape.  I've listened to a ton of new music on Spotify.  I've done a fair amount of online Christmas shopping.  Turns out you can get a lot of other stuff done when you're not sitting in physical limbo.  Go figure.  Sometimes you have to stop if you want to go.  I kind of knew this.  But, it's always good to good to get the reminder.  Onward.

Listen to this:

Under Stars - AURORA